Thursday, 13 May 2010

Sorry, it's a boring rant blog. But the centipede is cool!

Meet the Pink Dragon Millipede, Desmoxytes purpurosea, native to Thailand - one of the world's most beautiful insects. It looks like candy, smells like delicious almonds and shoots cyanide from it's mouth. Yup, you heard me. Cyanide. Spiny little sod ain't so pretty now, is it? (Img: Here) Perhaps that's where the cave name comes from - Hup Pa Tard. I think I'd shout something similar if this cutie got me.

Talking of "looking innocent but is very dangerous" - have you all seen these new money adverts? They offer "short term" loans - at shocking APRs like 2689%! To translate to English, £100 for 30 days is £137... and here was me being concerned about your average overdraft APR (18%ish). But at least Wonga are honest about it - "Is this APR expensive? Yep, we know. It’s huge."

Whilst I'm having a rant, is it too much to ask to get some proper TV? I'm currently getting 73 channels: adult, sales and news. What really gets me is why can't I watch something I like, for example Dave, in reasonable quality - but "Gay Rabbit" and QVC come through crystal clear?! As much as I appreciate Russian news, I'd rather have Film 4. Or anything of quality other than "Lambing Live" on BBC1. Mm, this is SO much an improvement from terrestrial TV. *pixellate crackle crackle pixels* In fact, I have decided - it sounds like the TV has hiccups!

Talking of TV - BLARH!!! They're not CHIPS, they're CRISPS! Chips are chunky bits of fried potato served with fish - big "chips" chopped off the potato. Crisps are thin and oh wow, get this - crispy! (Check out the size of that Prawn McCoy's crisp. Awesomeness.) American culture is creeping into the UK and it's deeply annoying; it's fish and chips -"Fish and fries" just sounds wrong. Piss off, Pringles and your stupid adverts. Bing too: Bing's adverts are ruh-huh-huh-HEA-lly annoying with the oversaturation on 4. I'm NOT going to be using your service, it's ugly and SUCKS. Viva la GOOGLE!

I can't believe I got ID'd for His Lordship's beer though. Why is it only the times I don't go shopping on my bike, and thus don't have my licence with me? Mind you, I love Tesco's. I really do. I like their bargains, their savings, their delivery and their "Express Shopper" facility. I even like their customer service staff, whom were incredibly efficient at solving my minor problem - the driver accidently drove off with my crumpets. They've refunded me the delivery costs and the missing items, sending me a very polite apology. I certainly don't mind, because I got a tenner off my shopping in the first place with one of their random emailshot money off vouchers! Although I bet you also didn't know that most wine, some fruit juices and alcohol isn't vegetarian. Turns out companies use fish or gelatin products to clarify them.

Interesting Word of the Day: "Defenestrate - to throw someone out of the window."

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